Sunday, August 21, 2005

Reconnecting

My second road trip of 2005 took Greta and me back to Virginia. I had gotten a call from David Dunn, long time friend who I first met while working at Elkhorn (see previous post). I hadn't seen him in almost 7 years so when he suggested we get together I responded by setting a date for the weekend of August 19--21. I also tracked down anotherlong time friend, Dick Smith, who I hadn't seen since a 1984 high school reunion.

Once again I went through Danville and stopped at Danville National Cemetery. This time the gate was locked on a Friday at 12:00 noon--what are they trying to protect there--maybe they saw Greta and me driving up. I also went over to another cemetery where my Danville next door neighbor is buried. I lost track of the Browns in the mid 1960s but remembered where their father was buried. Found the spot but since his wife wasn't interred there and no one else from their immediate family was there either I decided not to leave a note in a plastic bag letting them know I was there. In retrospect kinda stupid not leaving something.

Had dinner with the Dunns and the Smiths Friday night. It's amazingly easy to reconnect with old friends. As we BSd about the past it was like it happened yesterday instead of the last century. My only regret was I couldn't spend the whole weekend with both couples. I did go for a bike ride with Dick and Susan early Saturday morning before heading to Buggs Island Lake with David and Judy. For the most part it was just an easy ride with 2 close friends, but one thing out of the ordinary happened. Susan made a comment about how most of the time guys just talk about stuff (like sports) but don't share emotions. Out of the blue I told her about the death of my father and how he never admitted to anyone that he was dying. I also told her neither one of my parents ever told me they loved me. I said that after going through those kind of experiences I learned how to keep stuff to myself. I wish we had more time to explore that--but then again maybe I'm glad that's as far as we got.

One thing about re-connecting with them that makes me wonder about life. Judy's parents are both alive and dong OK. David's parents both live in an assisted care center. Dick's dad has dementia and Susan's mother is in a nursing home under constant supervision. Both my parents died at fairly young ages. My father had a clear mind until the end. Although my mother didn't function all that well after our father's death her mind stayed reasonably sharp. In earlier posts I expressed a desire to live for a long, long time and die peacefully. However, if my mind and body both go before death I hope I don't last long in that state.

The rest of the weekend was fairly uneventful. No earth shattering revelations, just a relaxing weekend with good friends. I have been fortunate in my life to have developed close friendships with lots of people over my life. Because I moved around so much during my career with Chubb over 20 years I made a lot of friends and lost touch with a lot of friends. One of my life goals is to reach out to many of these folks and see if I can re-connect in some fashion.